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6 Ways to Revive a Dying Relationship
No 3 and 4 are must do

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When we reminisce on memories such as times shared, beliefs, the plays, and silly jokes, the little fights, and unexplainable quarrels all these entangling memories (feelings) make us long for loved ones we have spent our lives with. Knowing that things are not the same and; the relationship is gradually dying can be a disturbing feeling. Sometimes the reasons for these are unexplainable but, sometimes they might be the little unresolved problems not given attention to or considered as insignificant that have started turning down the flames of love between both parties.
Things he used to do before has now gone into oblivion; how he used to call, care, worry about your well-being now look like sunshine in the winter season. After thorough researches and personal experiences on how to revive a dying relationship; below are the six (6) answers to the begging question:

1: Accept That There is a Problem


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The first step towards finding a solution to every problem is to accept that things are not the way they used to be. No dilly-dallying here, the picture has to be clear, and the problem has to be identified. Accepting this gives clarity on how it happened, where things started going south, and the cause of it. Then no 2:

2: Search Yourself


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At this stage, you want to be fair to yourself if your acts are the reasons why the relationship is dying slowly. Have you done something wrong and you sensed that he has not truly forgiven you? Is there something you are doing that he's not happy about? All these and more you have to ask yourself. After a satisfying conclusion maybe, the problems are from you or not, hold your thoughts there, and don't make any final decisions yet. Move to No 3:


3: Invite Him on a Date


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To a place where he's not familiar with. An environment that can make him bare his heart. Please don't invite him to a place where the deejay is playing a song like"nak am akpakpo" or some gangster beat banging kind of rap music rather take invite him to where there is quietness, an atmosphere for only two. To do this you don't have to have a large sum of money in your pause, you are not going there to buy their stocks rather you want to have a conversation with someone your heart is craving for, just a little stuff from their menu is good to go. Next!

4: Communicate


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Now, you want to ask questions and listen more. Every grey areas you want to ask him and get reasons for it. Why things are not the way they were, what are the things you are doing that he doesn't appreciate or find funny anymore. You do more of listening, getting to know his grievances, and the reason for his withdrawal actions. Ask all. If it is about sex, about family, another lady he's seeing, or any others subtly ask and give him listening ears to open up.

5: Conclusion


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After he had said all and you are satisfied with the answers you have gotten thus far this would help you to logically conclude where the problems are emanating from. If they are from you, you want to sincerely apologize this time, if he is getting some perceptions wrong you also want to clarify them all to him. Let your bubbles burst too, tell him things he is doing that you don't find funny also after it is a moment of truth for both parties. Ensure all issues are resolved before you guys leave the table.

6: Reconciliation (Follow-up)


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We always expect relationships to be like ripe fruit that falls naturally. Maybe because of the too many Hollywood and Nollywood movies we have watched but sometimes they are not like that. You have to work on your relationship to make it works. Since there are no grudges any more it is time to create time out of the busy schedules for each other. Find time within the week (preferably week not month or weeks) for both of you to spend with each other. A day should not go by without both parties talking to each other from there things would return to normal. Have a good life.



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Advantages and Disadvantages of having and not having Sex: What lack of sex can do to your body [2020]

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Sex is a physical activity that goes beyond the intimate touching of one's body with another. Sex has its impact on health that transcends what humans can verbally explain. The feelings and calmness that comes after a satisfying sexual adventure cannot be quantified. However, individuals can be lacking in sex due to reasons such as the absence of one's partner, emotional detachment, sicknesses, diseases, and recently maybe Coronavirus lock-down [oh! God, I hate Corona], and other reasons which are best known to the persons. Regardless of all of these; it should be noted that prolonged stay away from sex does not only affect one's health but also affect the psyche, physical functionality, and the level of intimacy in a couple relationship. Advantages and disadvantages of not having sex are many however, our interest here would be on the most important ones and among these are:

    Advantages of Having Sex:


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  • Cardiovascular checks: Scientists have shown that excess estrogen can wreak havoc on your body if it's not in proper balance with your other reproductive hormones, mainly progesterone. Since progesterone is a natural diuretic; estrogen dominance can lead to high blood pressure which makes heart diseases imminent. Sex on the other hand can help put a check to the estrogen and progesterone levels thereby preventing cardiovascular diseases.

  • Anti-diseases: Regular sexual intercourse helps the production of antibodies called immunoglobulin A, which helps to fight common cold.

  • Vaginal health: Vaginal health is enhanced when sex is constant by improving the blood flow around it and preventing dryness.

  • Reduction in cramps: Oh, that stomach biting that shows no remorse to someone when it comes. Menstrual cramps can be reduced when sex is constant prior to a week or more before lady red comes around town.

    Disadvantages of not Having Sex:


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  • A sex-starved lady is an angry lady, her oxytocin and endorphins would be so high that she can throw tantrum to anyone at any time. The slightest thing can make her want to lash out at anyone. She’s the type that can be said: “to raise a storm out of a teacup”.

  • Mental fuzziness: Sex helps in mental performance. For it helps to rearrange the brain and helps clear thinking on any tasks involved. There are calmness and clarity of thoughts which are devoid of stress.

  • The weakening of libido arousal: A lady who does not engage in constant sex would find it hard for her wheels to be kept rolling when it comes to sexual activity. Simply put less sex leads to less craving for sex.

  • Less submissiveness by the male partner: Studies have shown that men tend to be open and willing to give (e.g., finance), share their darkest secrets, drop their arrogance, give his lady a warm shower and cuddle at a cold night, and willing to let go of formerly contending issues that were drudgery before sex. While it is said that food is the pathway towards a man’s heart, sex on the other hand is the clear way towards a man’s submissiveness.

    Advantages of not having Sex:


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  • While is it encouraged to engage in sexual intercourse constantly however, some benefits also come to those who choose to abstain from sex among these are:
  • Reduced chance of pregnancy: No sex, no pregnancy, period. This also frees you from taking any contraceptive pills whose side effects are hidden from the final consumer

  • Chances of contracting sexually transmitted infections are brought to its barest minimum.

  • Putting one’s self on a check and proper sexual monitoring: Absence of sex gives you time to truly look at sex from an external point of view and reminisce on past ones, the different intimacies you would have handled better and provide room for you to get better on next sexual relationship.

  • Healing time: Vagina experiences some kind of tightening and some form of repositioning due to lack of sex. Also during this time, you might want to pursue other dreams, reflect on other things, use your energy on other ambitions that you desire to achieve or other health issues that you need to sort out before the urge for it comes banging at your door like an angry neighbor looking for a fight.

  • The advantage that also comes with not having sex for a very long period is that you can use that period to reorientate yourself about your present relationship if the time you are giving to it is worth it or not and if the future perception you have about the relationship is shaky or still standing tall

Conclusion!!!


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While it is advisable to not abstain from sex for that long due to the benefits that it brings to health; the decision to want to abstain from it can still be rewarding to the lady that chose to abstain and know how to convert the time, energy, and train of its thought into something more useful and beneficial to herself.
It should be noted that choosing to stay away from sex should be a mutual agreement between one’s self and partner to avoid the feeling of inconsideration which may lead to promiscuity, disagreement, and resentment. Good luck and Good life.




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5 things to do and not do when dating older partner (2020)

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An online news website known as the Bright Side shared on their website Brightside some reasons why women find older men so attractive; among the reasons given were:

  • They are more mature
  • They know stuff
  • They know what they want
  • They are more financially stable
  • They are partners
  • and they have no problem helping women around the house

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The way our lives, our faces, our expectations, our behaviors are different, there is no exception to these when it comes to choosing life partners with whom we want to spend our lives with. Preference is a silly and tricky lady that abandons the norm and choose to cling to that which best suit her. Today on the focus of relationship and sex, we are going to look at 5 do’s and don’ts when dating older partners. Older partner in the context of this page refers to partners that are at least ten (10) years older than the lady with whom they are dating, married to or about to be married. There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting to date a partner that maybe 10 years or more older than one's self, just like every relationship it is advisable to be armed with the right knowledge to be able to have a fulfilling and adventurous experiences and life.


5 things to do when dating an older partner:


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  1. Take care of him: It is expected that the partner must be the one to take care of the lady, in this case, there is no exception to it. However, aging comes with its relegating tendencies and you should understand that. Taking care of him does not mean doing everything entirely for him, no! It simply means giving him the care you would give to the same age-mate partner with a little extra.

  2. Be Sensitive and Understanding: Know that you are dating an older partner, asking for sky-scraping tasks and sexually rigorous escapades should be put to check. Understand his strength and operate on that level.
    If he's made comfortable when it comes to his sexual, emotional, financial, physical, and other roles he's playing to you; trust me that would spur him to do more and at the end of the day everyone would smile and everyone would be happy. You can also check out our previous post on Advantages and Disadvantages of having and not having Sex: What lack of sex can do to your body [2020]

  3. Be his second strength: Know for sure that he won't leave the roles he's supposed to perform to you; his men ego won't allow him to do such. Among these roles, know the one that you can comfortably handle and sort it out without raising any dust about it.

  4. Rejuvenate him: By introducing him into the fancy, harmless, make-believe, and fairy-tale world of a young lady and let him bask in it, loose his guard, and find succour in it.

  5. Show that you love him: Humans by nature are very sensitive to issues around them, most older partners dating younger ladies always feel that the lady is dating them for one material gain or the other; getting to help him pass this mentality is a high and bumpy hill task which you alone can climb through by explicitly showing how much you love him.


5 Things to not do when Dating Older Partner are:


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  1. Don't Make the Age an Issue: Giving comments such as "You know you are old and you shouldn't be doing this or eating this" should be discarded there are more and effective ways to go about it which only you can find out and maturely make use of.

  2. You are not dating or married to an older man: Getting to see your relationship as a relationship between two age-mates would have a tremendous impact on smoothing things out between both of you. See him like an age-mate partner, relate with him that way, and you would see that there is no sweeter relationship as such.

  3. If he's a divorcee or has step-children: Do not treat the step-children and former wife as insignificant. Give them a welcoming environment, let them have access to you and him. Treat them with respect and regard. Feign ignorant if they are having the perception that you came to date their father because of material gains with time such notion would wax off like unrefrigerated ice-cream.

  4. Do not make him feel jealous of another younger guy seeking for your attention: Except you truly don't have the plan of being with him.
    If you don't it's best to off the smoke before the fire starts burning. But if you do, whoever is the guy seeking for your attention, make it crystal clear to the guy that you are totally not interested at his immature gimmicks, if possible report him to your present partner and probably make him seriously warn the guy unnecessarily disturbing you because some dudes can be a pinch in the boobs (lol). This would not only help you to gain his trust more, it would also prove to him how interested you are in him.

  5. Be picky of the pet name you call him: I don't think it's possible to have someone special in our lives without wanting to call them one preferred name or another. It should be noted that in this situation you want to give him pet name that radiates youthfulness, rigorousness, manliness, and others that boost his ego that he's still young, vibrant, and capable to do anything.

Conclusion!!!


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Dating an older partner does not mean that the younger ones are not fancy-looking or unavailable, it just mean that this is the person you prefer and age, like they say, is just a number.

For those that have dated, got married to someone that is ten years or more older them would tell you that it is life-fulfilling, a higher level of understanding, serene peace of mind when you are with the right partner. It is on this note I want to say that, know your partner, read through the things to do and not do when dating an older partner again and watch your relationship blossom. Good luck and Good life.